Horsemen (2009) - Crime, Drama, Mystery

Hohum Score

94

Hohummer

A recently widowed detective still grieving over his wife's death discovers a shocking connection between a serial killing spree and the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

IMDB: 5.6
Director: Jonas Åkerlund
Stars: Dennis Quaid, Ziyi Zhang
Length: 90 Minutes
PG Rating: R
Reviews: 37 out of 88 found boring (42.04%)

One-line Reviews (97)

Given the fact that what it ultimately wants to say is nowhere near as compelling as it thinks it is, the film turns from intriguing to unwelcome guest with the flick of a switch.

Speaking of spoilers, all the way through this, about four scenes before something happens, I kept thinking, "Oh, he's this" or "He'll discover this" or "The killer is…" Despite the fact I thought the movie was well shot, the locales made the most of the depressing city it portrays and Quaid did an above-average job, as he almost always does, the movie was very flat, (again) predictable and too clichéd.

Tiresome and completely unpleasant thriller .

Shallow and pretentious .

As my summary stated, "I know an 7 is high," but for her performance alone it was definitely worth watching and remembering.

Horsemen might even have a more stylish and riveting aesthetic photographic vision than Se7en.

At about 90 odd minutes long Horsemen starts off very well with a rich & suspenseful murder mystery but then it tends to focus on Breslin's family life which in the context of the twist ending is important but it slow's things down & I started to lose a bit of interest as the focus moved further & further from the killing's.

HORSEMEN's script is as disjointed, uneven and ultimately shallow, even by Hollywood standards.

The lines are terribly cliché' and the actors, while capable, are just waiting for there time to speak, never fully absorbed into the movie.

Seriously, the twists were so ridiculous and uninteresting that none of them held and tension or were effective in any way.

It's got an involving (albeit in the end somewhat elaborate and far-fetched) plot, it's fast-paced, well-acted and absolutely entertaining.

However, the unpleasant and predictable story is quite pointless and has a disappointing and lame conclusion.

Thrilling musical score fitting to action and tension by Jan Kaczmarek who formerly won an Academy Award for ¨Finding Neverland ¨.

Pucci,as usual did great in this bombastic,so poorly written and contrived piece of junk.

' The movie became so predictable that I knew who was going to be the last victim.

Idiotic, dull, unoriginal and predictable .

Horsemen suffers a disjointed structure, with extremely poor characterisation and seam-filled editing causing a stop-start judder to permeate throughout.

It just isn't that good, and is actually pretty boring most of the time.

This is a pretty slow going film for the most part which isn't a bad thing if the story keeps your attention and entertains you.

By-the-numbers gore flick isn't especially bad, but sterile acting and disjointed direction hinder it entirely.

Detective Breslin (Quaid) is after someone who is killing people and hanging them on a contraption with hooks boring into the skin.

Slow and Tedious and not Scary .

However, there seems to be somewhat of a disconnect though between Ziyi Zhang's fascinating character and the ending sequence of the movie.

Among this, we're treated to his dreary family life of being a widowed father to two sons who aren't coping with their mother's death very well, and the family values shtick is laid on thicker than molasses.

As the movie appears to hit its low point, Quaid gets quite an unexpected lead...

Definitely worth the watch if you're up for this sort of thing.

Some sequences are unbearable.

Empty, storyless, extremely unbelievable .

This frightening and suspenseful thriller concerns about an unsettling and bitter cop emotionally affected for the death of his devoted wife by cancer , being trapped into a dark and tenebrous environment .

Soon enough,Breslin and his partner Stingray(Clifton Collins Jr. from Traffic looking bored out of his mind.

Cliché among clichés.

However, unlike its 'source of inspiration', 'Horsemen' is devoid of thrills and boring to no end.

What really sinks the film down is the script, which is really inane and cliché-ridden to the point it is barely bearable to listen to.

Quaid as ever is okay, but looks like he is constipated throughout the film, and has to go through the old cliché of not being able to do anything with his kids because his phone keeps going off.

An earlier reviewer said his friend thought this was the worst movie he'd ever seen.

The film is enjoyable though not memorable.

This exciting picture contains thrills, chills, plot twists, action-filled and lots of gore and guts .

This time it is much more stunning then usual.

"Horseman of the Apocalypse" is a fascinating, if at the same time frustratingly detached experience.

The movie is too predictable, after watching the half of it, you know by 90% how it will end.

Here he struggles to play a hardened detective reminiscent of Al Pacino in Insomnia, his lines are forced, he is simply a poor casting choice for this role.

In any case, it's still an enjoyable movie, that at least isn't a repeat, a remake, or a sequel.

Enjoyable but too predictable.

The only suspenseful thing about this movie was wondering how much longer it could go on, how much more hideous torture we would be subjected to, and when the totally predictable ending would finally arrive.

The script he is given is so clichéd and uninteresting that it is unbelievable this ever made it to production.

After the film was over, the person I watched the movie with turned to me and stated that it was truly the absolute worst movie he had ever seen in his life.

Jonas Åkerlund direction is first-class, creating some atmospheric and jumpy moments but it's failing is the S & M story, that fizzles out towards the end into cliché whodunit tosh.

Those sequences between these two characters are probably the most compelling and effective, mainly because of Zhang.

Every single "serial killer on the loose" movie cliché is lined up, making Horsemen a tribute to these flicks or a "best of" compilation at best and a sad copy at worst.

And that in turn makes it somewhat enjoyable to appreciate it...

Expect the unexpected.

As other comments disclose, it's too predictable.

A disappointing end of an entertaining but otherwise too predictable movie.

The story had a great idea no doubt, however it is in structure disjointed and the sluggish pace and derivative direction further hamper it.

The opening of this film is visually satisfying, they do some very interesting things with ice and fog, everything leading up to the revelation on the ice is fascinating and consuming.

I am glad to say the movie was worth the watch.

I agree with the reviews that it is predictable though I think being predictable is not a downside for this movie as it shows that the character cant even see the obvious truth while we watchers can,which I think is a good description of the character.

Really entertaining with some great acting .

Besides the loosely bound script, the main problem is the cliché of having to endure another torture-porn flick hot on the heels of self righteous proclaiming others like "Saw" and "Untraceable".

" Slow thriller.

Unpleasant and Predictable .

The outcome was predictable as it was evident with the family attending church & the son's fixed stare on the priest & his sermon.

This was only a small part of the beginning of the end for Horsemen; The sub-plot between Quaid and his emo son was far too cliché, the "you are never there for me so I'm gonna get revenge" plot line has been done too many times already.

I know an 7 is high, but Ziyi Zhang makes this worth watching .

The final result feels like a cheap horror B-movie that's trying to be an intense psychological thriller.

And I should probably check that one out because this movie was really uninvolving, moved too fast and performances are uninspiring and boring.

Somewhere at the core of Horsemen there is a good idea and a riveting premise.

But if you’d like to see an engaging, well made film, Horsemen is more than fine.

Interesting aspects of this film were unexpected.

This embarrassing disaster had reshoots galore, but the final product is unwatchable and was barely released in the US by Lionsgate and they never even bothered to post the box office receipts from the 75 screens it played on.

On top of this, the direction is also pretty bad, with music director Jonas Akerlund contributing to the confusion by shoddy editing with lots of jump cuts and the like.

Pretty average with boring characters and a silly premise .

What a waste of time!

Its worth the watch.

The story's quite engrossing to start.

'' This movie gets dragged into this pit of boredom.

**SPOILERS** Disjointed crime thriller that has to do with the Biblical Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse coming back on earth for the great unveiling that will usher the world into the dreaded end of times.

In it's first scenes I thought the movie was promising, and it kept me going for like 20 minutes, without complaining, but when the plot begins to twist, I began to think that it was not worth watching, and then that it's one of the worst movies of the year.

And from the viewers point of view more intriguing;Why....? When we learn that Kristens father(Peter Stormare,he's unfortunately just in two scenes)have molested her for years,things get really interesting....

Its just 90 minutes intense,brutal and honest entertaining.

But the scenes with Quaid and the kids are long and drawn out, the the casting for the kids was completely terrible, and the story moves at a snail's pace, and Quaid himself comes off as completely depressed and absent of any emotion, which doesn't help us empathize with him as he encounters all the gory and scary stuff, and everyone else in this sleeper just seems to be going through the motions of another moody serial killer thriller that is awaiting a final twist.

Minor details like "Dad, need breakfast food" in the beginning led to a kind of unexpected conclusion.

The really depressing aspect is the realization that so much money and talent was poured into this black hole of a confusing plot line leaving most, including myself, lost toward the end.

The script had more holes than a vagrant's vest; trying to be hip and terse, it simply came across as disjointed, stumbling, and poorly structured, and as if the writer was trying desperately to get as many deeply unpleasant happenings as possible into one woefully inadequate work.

Some of the most obvious things are said numerous times and it becomes repetitive and annoying.

Well, I don't want to give any real spoilers (heck, it practically spoils itself) but 'Horsemen' sadly is an unfinished movie, like an exciting auto chase in the middle of a film and without warning the good guy swerves off an unseen cliff and the film's over.

Predictable, poorly acted, out-of-touch pantomime.

As a police detective, Quaid comes off strong and believable, but his role as a father is confusing, seemingly opting to drop twenty dollar bills on the counter in place of adequately caring for two children.

Truly one of the worst movies I've seen in a long time, and what a misuse of Dennis Quaid's acting talents.

The murders are gory, bloody, perverse and it's hard to watch the crime scenes where the victims are hung up on some contraption with hooks boring into the skin.

Why was it unexpected?

The "message" or "controlling idea" in the end ultimately turns out to be pretentious and very shallow.

Not satisfied with comic book heroes (Batman, Iron Man, Spiderman, etc.), or flat-out fantasy (Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, etc.), Hollywood has turned to outright religious propaganda (Knowing, Henry Poole Was Here, Taking Chance etc.). I enjoy watching movies as often as possible, so this trend was readily apparent to me.

As annoying and trite as it seems, it's kind of essential to the story so I guess you have to let it go.

Yes the ending was pretty predictable.

A solid, entertaining, gotta recommend it to your friends movie, even if we won't be talking about it in ten years.

Waste of time .