“ Unfortunately, following the opening slaughter of a man and his son, the gore-lubricated gears of Hatchet slow down to an almighty, frustrating halt for a good while, in place of developing a tiresome, unnecessary story.
“ It is a completely incoherent mess and a waste of time.
“ What burns my goat is that these sites frequently lead horror fans astray by shamelessly gushing over the most cliché-ridden and mediocre crap being released these days.
“ Director: Adam Green seems to understand just how bad the Hollywood version of horror films have become, and delivers an alternative to the bevy of pretentious garbage they hurl at us on a weekly basis.
“Cliché Alert #4: Gotta have the non-starting vehicle.
“ People who read IMDb comments might be tempted to view this total waste of time, as I was, by false tag-lines like " A throwback to 80's horror" and what-not.
“Cliché Alert #6: Damn cell phones!
“ Predictable rubbish .
“ Full of cliché's, stupid monster, stupid actrices, a shame this film came out and it gets 5.9/10 !!!!
“ It got to the point where I was just fast-forwarding the uninteresting, poorly-written "oh-no-what-do-we- do" filler to get to the kills, which are few and far between.
“Trying to dissect the film to make sense of how Crowley lives and has the abilities he has to inflict such damage to victims is a waste of time.
“ Unfortunately, I'm still not recommending the film do to sub-par acting, low production values, and a tedious first half.
“ I'm getting so bored of all this, aren't you?
“ Horror aficionados will appreciate a few cameos from genre favourites, Robert Englund (A Nightmare on Elm Street) and Tony Todd (Candyman) all make brief, but entertaining, appearances.
“ If it's a collection of in-jokes and clichés, it's a pretty entertaining one.
“Cliché Alert #5: Crazy old man!
“ Every single horror movie cliché can be ticked off, which results in a movie with zero 'scare' moments.
“"Hatchet" doesn't add anything to the horror genre, but it's entertaining.
“I have to say that I enjoyed it more or less even if (or, perhaps, because) the gore involved was incredibly over-the-top; unfortunately, the film then shot itself in the foot with an all-too-typical (and frankly ludicrous, to say nothing of unnecessarily downbeat) final twist!
“ Nothing happens for an excruciating forty-five minutes of "character development".
“ You have your cliché characters of course; the nerdy guy, the token African American, the bitch, the dumb bimbo, the pervert, the goofy older couple, the con-artist, and the woman who knows about the creature.
“Even though it was totally predictable, and not to well thought out, IT WAS PRETTY DAMN GOOD.
“ Next to Eragon, the worst movie I've seen this year.
“ The plot is very thin, characters are extremely generic and boring.
“All in all a pretty solid and extremely entertaining slasher flick which doesn't lie when it says that it's an old-school American horror flick, because that's just what it is.
“ Additionally, the second half of this film is very entertaining and will keep you in the edge of your seat.
“ Not bad, all things considered, entertaining.
“ It's one of the more enjoyable casts you'll see in a slasher.
“ This movie is truly a cliché amongst the horror movie genre.
“ It's an empty suit.
“ I do hope this film's exuberant following will allow Green to return to the director's chair..while I think this film is entertaining, he's liable to create even more enjoyable films as he directs more and more.
“ If it lets you down, you are too enthralled in the grips of special effects and have forgotten your roots of Michael Meyers and Jason, Victor Crowley may not be a legacy like those two, but the movie does deserve some credit, because it was entertaining and made me jump a few times.
“ The movie moves at a fantastic pace and has nary a slow or boring moment.
“ Whether they're horrible or nice, they're entertaining.
“ If you enjoy over-the-top gore, pointless & bland scripts with terrible acting and a low-budget.
“ It's a simple and entertaining slice 'em and dice 'em film.
“ Not only did this movie include all your typical slasher clichés, but it executed them in a way that was fresh and exciting, a very refreshing change from all of the remakes, sequels, and torture movies that are currently being released.
“Has got to be one of the worst movies i have ever seen in my life, the ''monster'' looked completely dumb and the things he was able to do were retarded and not scary or logical in any way.
“ The performances come off as cheesy on purpose, and the comedy is filled to the brim with wit, making any scene lacking carnage just as enjoyable.
“ It does have an original story, but some will call this movie pointless killing.
“Cliché Alert #8: Final survivors.
“ And while everyone is quite entertaining and funny, it seems as though every conversation is either back-story or just jokes.
“ The storyline is a predictable one in which a tour group visit the bayous by boat only to fall foul of an indestructible killer with a horrifically mutilated face who begins to dispatch them one by one.
“ Tamara Feldman is OK, just a bit dull as the overly serious female lead and very annoying.
“The premise of the film offers up the opportunity to really get the audience on the edge of their seats, it's a good idea very poorly executed.
“ The horror side of things is surprisingly entertaining as well.
“Hatchet is an entertaining & pleasingly gory throwback to the heyday of the 80's slasher, your disposition to this type of film will ultimately decide whether you like it or not.
“Cliché Alert #9: Taken directly from Friday the 13th.
“ The script deliberately uses the often used slasher premise of having a group of victims, sorry people stranded in some sort of isolated location due to some improbable & contrived situation where they are promptly killed off one-by-one by some sort of sadistic killer in a variety of memorable set-pieces.
“Hatchet is definitely worth watching.
“ Fun entertaining tribute to old school slashers .
“I'll simply put it, this Movie is horrible and boring, avoid it unless you enjoy brainless low-budget splatter-films with no heart.
“Ben (Joel David Morse) has been dragged down to New Orleans for Mardi Gras by his friends.
“ but one of the worst movie's i've seen.
“if every horror movie had gore wouldn't that get boring.
“ Add to that an unexpected abrupt ending and the confusion is perfect.
“ Sure it's not great, but it is entertaining.
“Cliché Alert #3: Hot dumb blonde!
“Entertaining from start to finish, THIS is the kind of flick you go to with 10 screaming hollering friends.
“The villain's back story is thin, goofy and uninteresting.
“The villain I thought wasn't scary,and very cliché,like ya,he'll rip you apart but he has no character,he's just crazy,though he's a parody of Jason Voorhees,just not a good one,he was so bland.
“ This movie is a little too slow.
“Cliché Alert #7: Killer can't be killed.
“ Flawed but surprisingly entertaining .
“Overall there are enough jumps and laughs to keep it going for its extremely short run time (85 mins), but If you are a die hard horror fan, then you will have seen most horrors and will find the nostalgic feel of 'Hatchet' enjoyable, which it is in a mindless way.
“ Aside from a tiresome conclusion, just about every piece of this film is well done.
“very funny and highly entertaining.
“If you want to go see a funny, entertaining, often gory little movie that will occasionally make you jump, I definitely recommend Hatchet.
“ The most entertaining movie in years.
“Cliché Alert #2: The male lead recovering from a break-up.
“ The film is the first in a series of(drumroll) similarly-made and similarly entertaining and qualified slasher Hatchet-flicks - creating a "b-movie" slasher-icon in "Victor Crowley" and putting me all-in for future, developing efforts from the director.
“Cliché alert #1: The gay-bashing father of the somewhat cowardly son is a bit overdone.
“The movie was overall predictable.
“ But watching HATCHET last week I have to say it was the most entertaining movie I saw in many YEARS!
“ Everyone gets his or her share of (intentionally) hilarious line readings, while Ben remains an enjoyable straight man.
“ They had pointless sex scenes, nudity, great gore, scary villains and cheesy unbelievable situations where the girl somehow runs up the stairs vs.
“ With the talented cast and reliable - if predictable - storyline, at the very least it marks Green as a filmmaker to keep your eye on.
“ "How do we end this dumb, predictable story?
“ The background-story involving the monster, slasher whatever is very dull, the jokes are hit-and-miss most of the time and there is no tension or suspense or whatever.
“ Over-Hyped Slasher Flick Throwback, Entertaining Though.
“ It's completely over the top and really silly, but it's also rather extreme and the death scenes are all very entertaining.
“ They're bland, boring, and a dime a dozen.
“ You have a killing, some running away, some light relief then some slow dialogue before beginning the cycle again.
“ The rundown of murder is stupid and predictable.
“ We get quite a bit of nudity so add that onto the death scenes and you've got a pretty entertaining little film.
“ This mix of emotions makes for a thrilling movie experience.
“ In lesser hands, a film like this could have wound up being straight-to-video junk, but with this very able cast (most of which did a great job) and a more than capable director, it wound up being one of the most entertaining movies of 2007.
“ On the contrary, daft, cross-generic horror can be very entertaining and should be praised as such.
“Now when i say low budget don't misconstrue the film or avoid it because movies like these do not need a very big budget,i mean a slasher should have gore,screaming,running,a psychotic or a monstrous killer,dumb teenagers and above all this all mixed in a bearable way to conceive an entertaining film,Hatchet is a good example of all this.
“ Each version becomes more tedious.
“ I found this comedy horror quite entertaining.
“The movie was entertaining, I'll give it that.
“The storyline was boring and predictable, and i didn't really care for any of the characters either, and some people have "TRIED" to claim that Victor Crowley, is the next horror icon.........
“ Wasted 1.3 hour (lucky that i can surf some more this evening, or complete waste of time).
“ They were obviously hired to sell the movie and at least two of them appear in roles that are basically pointless.
“ entertaining as hell.
“ It's all rather boring and predictable and just average to be honest, it's only saving grace is the gory death scenes, of which some were very good.
“ A fair amount of gore and fast paced enough that you don't get bored.
“ The creativity and downright grossness of the violence in this movie just makes the whole film that much more entertaining.
“Bottom line: A well made and highly enjoyable slasher flick.
“The verdict: 8/10, one of the most entertaining slasher out there and the best slasher to come out in recent years for sure
“ There are a handful of good ones, but in general the slasher genre is made up of dull and rather samey films.
“ That also brings up the film's other great elements in a series of spectacularly brutal and graphic kills here that make for a really exciting time watching the carnage on display here as it rips people to pieces, hacks off limbs and really just displays no outward rationale for keeping people in one piece.
“ The worst part about this movie is how the script feels empty, that's my main problem.
“If watching a poorly-acted, suspenseless, snoozer of a movie about Sloth from the Goonies kill people in a fashion that completely ignores every law of physics (pulling on an unrestrained person's legs, causing them to be ripped from the torso) is your idea of a good movie, then knock yourself out.
“ Moreover, I thought the first half was way too dull and I wouldn't be surprised if someone decided to stop watching half way through.
“ A wildly entertaining tongue-in-cheek indie horror splatter treat .
“ And i don't know how the hell it get it's life back when he died, but it just so boring..Also, i don't feel the character so much.
“ Repetitive, silly, and completely lacking in suspense are what comes to my mind when I think of Hatchet, and that is being relatively kind to it.
“This is the most unconvincing and cliché film I've seen for years.
“Every horror cliché imaginable is on display here.
“ I always that unlikable performers dragged down a film, despite how strong a script is or how entertaining the film is overall.
“ Stabs in the chest or in some other way that makes the death sort of bland...
“ however, after sitting through 80 minutes of predictable "suprises" that didn't even make me jump and unrealistic villain, i was left hugely disappointed.
“ There were also some suspenseful scenes.
“ This is a movie that I really needed because sometimes you have to see the pointless moments, hear the cheesy one liners and of course have the extreme stereotypes.
“ One of the worst movies I have seen this year.
“ Every death is long, drawn out and features a whole of lot of blood spray!
“ Simply Riveting.
“ The movie begins with a good amount of humor, and a typical storyline for a slasher movie(which is good) but some jokes a bit dull, though it was good laughing throughout the film.
“ You get pointless nudity.
“I won't tell you any more than that for fear of spoiling the film, that's if you feel you can venture beyond the predictable horror clichés that are to come.
“Still worth watching at least to say you've seen it.
“ The old couple are boring background characters that were upgraded in this movie.
“ I almost walked out.
“ It's entertaining and has hungry actors and actresses.
“ If the monster running through the woods, hacking down cliché characters is supposed to be classic then there are movies released every year to fit that bill...
“ Even though there is some serious blood & gore in Hatchet it is a little slow at times, the first thirty odd minutes is pretty forgettable actually & it only lasts for just over eighty minutes!
“Nonetheless, amongst all the dire remakes, shoddy Saw movies and bland sequels, Green has created a damn good horror/comedy with bucket loads of extreme gore.
“ Got bored one day ( Like a normal 18 year old ) and said lets find something violent.
“ Where was the suspense, the anticipation of the next slaughter, or anything vaguely unexpected?
“ horror fans will find it entertaining - other peeps, nahsomuch .
“What was most surprising was the element of real terror underpinning the parody: one scene in which a girl discovers her father's corpse and her subsequent hysterics was unexpected, likewise the sudden disappearances and labyrinthine swamp.
“ The set-up is repetitive, the dialogue is corny, and the special effects (while horrifically gory) are not that great.
“ The whole thing reeks of clichés (the trapped in the "woods" has been done to death - pun intended) and stock characters (the funny-sounding Asian man, the bimbos, the American tourists, the tough girl, the cowardly racist black man), who happen to be totally uninteresting and unlikeable.
“ Yes, there were moments where I barked an unexpected laugh or found myself smiling a bit, as in when Victor Crowley is first shown...
“ Parents should be warned that the proceedings are intense and the suspense unrelenting, so keep you children out of the viewing area as you immerse yourself in the cinema experience known as Hatchet.
“ Sound cliché'?
“Despite failing to deliver on the "old school American horror" that was promised, Hatchet is still a fairly enjoyable slasher film worth checking out for slasher film fans.
“ Not the Next Great Horror Film, but Entertaining .
“The movie was often very predictable about when and where the scares would occur though.
“ It's not a perfect movie, but it IS a perfectly entertaining one.
“ It's for that reason that I was never really interested in Hatchet and didn't find myself in any sort of rush to see it; but to my greatest surprise, this film actually manages to take all of the slasher clichés and construct a very entertaining little film out of it!
“The end segment of the film dispenses with the (intentional) laughs in favour of dreary hide and slaughter business.
“ My main problem with this movie aside from the dull pace is the stupidity and insolence of the characters.
“ if you like your cheap thrills and pointless topless girls then you'll love thisfor being a horror/slasher/thriller movie fan and believe me ask anyone and they will tell you how obsessed i am.
“ and yes, there it is, predictable as well.
“ DVD has an enjoyable commentary track by the cast & crew, 39 minute documentary with the cast & crew, four featurettes and a gag reel.
“ Not a masterpiece, its a very simple and small movie, just like those very entertaining 80s movies.
“ Hatchet never gets boring, it is constantly moving and because of this, is made much more exciting.
“ But the characters' sensible approach adds to the film immeasurably, and since the death scenes aren't as telegraphed as disciples of '80s splatter are used to seeing, some of the best jump-scares in the piece arise from Crowley's emergence at unexpected moments.
“ Frankly, I fell asleep somewhere along the way.
“ It should be scary, but instead it just gets boring.
“All the characters were dull and insipid (as if the poor acting wouldn't have been enough) and they lack any shred of connection with one another ...
“New kill methods make it interesting and unpredictable for the most part.
“ That background story is old as time itself, but that it is what it's supposed to be, using classic elements in this fun entertaining old school slasher, which truly does deliver.
“ I only remember a boring and thoughtless plot with horrific actors.
“ I thought Rob Zombie's Halloween remake was the worst movie i've seen this year until I saw this garbage!